As I sat in front of my computer one morning, I was all alone. The children were not awake. The hubs had gone to work. There was a strange quietness in my den...until I farted really loud. No, seriously, I did. I was taken aback by the loudness of it, and I kind of giggled about it. That's when it occurred to me; I would never do that in front of ANYONE! Why would I let it rip when I'm alone? Light bulb moment. We all do things when we are alone that we would NEVER do in front of anyone else. Not even a spouse.
So, without further ado.....things I do when I'm alone...
1. Walk around the house with no pants on. Ewww, gross! Just the pants pervert! Of course I wear underwear!
2. Stay in my pajamas until it's time to pick up the children from school. Then, I don't even take a real shower...I wash my hair in the sink and put on makeup to make it seem as though I actually got dressed on a day when I had no where to go.
3. Fart. Out. Loud. Stop it...you know you do it too. You're just not admitting to it on the interwebs like me.
4. Dance. That's right. I will turn the radio up as loud as it will go and get all risky business in my kitchen while unloading the dishwasher. If you paid attention to the aforementioned items, you already know that I don't wear pants, so I imagine I look really silly.
5. Watch Lifetime Movie Network like it's my only chance for survival. It almost makes me crazy enough to fake a pregnancy, amnesia, cheat on my spouse with his boss, seduce a young neighbor, and drive really fast. Okay, so I don't go that crazy, but it absolutely sucks me in. Every time.
What are some things that you do when you are alone? Things you'd never do in front of anyone?
And be sure to check back later this week for a really fun give away!
2 comments:
Yep, farting, burping, scratching, wearing no clothes. dancing, talking to the dog, we all do it :)
That's funny! My girls run around barely dressed as well! Crazy kids!
Post a Comment